Sunday, September 26, 2010
A month and a half later
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAH
So what do you think of that? It has been a month and a half since my first post. Not very promising is it. No it is not, says the little voice in my head. I am hoping that the little voice is my conscience and not another personality or just some other random form of crazy setting in. I worry about being crazy. Is it crazy to worry about being crazy? I know people say crazy people don't know they're crazy, but do crazy people wonder if they're crazy? Just a question. Thought I would put it out there.
Anyway, I digress from the crazy talk. So what has happened since my last bog? Well I quit smoking. YAY me , less chance of lung cancer. I also have not had a Pepsi in 4 weeks. I have had iced tea, water, tea, chocolate milk, regular milk and a couple cokes but no Pepsi. For me this is a big deal. I used to drink at least 4 cans a day. Usually a lot more, 4 was a slow day. What else...... Meaghan started Kindergarten.
Now I should tell you that Meaghan starting kindergarten is a big deal. Not because it is such a huge milestone for her but because I took her to her first day and I did not cry. I got a little choked up. I had that tingle in my nose and behind my eyes (you know the one you get when you start to cry and you fight it real hard). I however did not give in to temptation. Wanna know why? "No" (says the little voice). Well I'm gonna tell you anyway. I didn't cry for the following reasons
1. Meaghan didn't cry
2. Meaghan was super excited
3. Dave (husband) and Sarah(best friend) were there and would have laughed at me, and then made fun of me for days. And anyone who knows me knows I am not always very fond of being made fun of. Even when it is just for fun.
4. If you had seen the gong show behind us you would understand completely why I chocked back the tears. Picture it... first day of kindergarten young boy and mother must part ways for 3 hrs and neither one believes themselves capable of living without the other for that amount of time. So they cling to each other in the hopes that this is all a bad dream and the dreaded first day of school is really another year away.
Anyway, Meaghan and I made it through the first day very well. Her favorite part, you'll never guess, TAKING THE BUS. She loves to take the bus both to and from school.
SO this will bring and end to post number 2. Not much but a few tidbits of that last few weeks.
Enjoy
B
So what do you think of that? It has been a month and a half since my first post. Not very promising is it. No it is not, says the little voice in my head. I am hoping that the little voice is my conscience and not another personality or just some other random form of crazy setting in. I worry about being crazy. Is it crazy to worry about being crazy? I know people say crazy people don't know they're crazy, but do crazy people wonder if they're crazy? Just a question. Thought I would put it out there.
Anyway, I digress from the crazy talk. So what has happened since my last bog? Well I quit smoking. YAY me , less chance of lung cancer. I also have not had a Pepsi in 4 weeks. I have had iced tea, water, tea, chocolate milk, regular milk and a couple cokes but no Pepsi. For me this is a big deal. I used to drink at least 4 cans a day. Usually a lot more, 4 was a slow day. What else...... Meaghan started Kindergarten.
Now I should tell you that Meaghan starting kindergarten is a big deal. Not because it is such a huge milestone for her but because I took her to her first day and I did not cry. I got a little choked up. I had that tingle in my nose and behind my eyes (you know the one you get when you start to cry and you fight it real hard). I however did not give in to temptation. Wanna know why? "No" (says the little voice). Well I'm gonna tell you anyway. I didn't cry for the following reasons
1. Meaghan didn't cry
2. Meaghan was super excited
3. Dave (husband) and Sarah(best friend) were there and would have laughed at me, and then made fun of me for days. And anyone who knows me knows I am not always very fond of being made fun of. Even when it is just for fun.
4. If you had seen the gong show behind us you would understand completely why I chocked back the tears. Picture it... first day of kindergarten young boy and mother must part ways for 3 hrs and neither one believes themselves capable of living without the other for that amount of time. So they cling to each other in the hopes that this is all a bad dream and the dreaded first day of school is really another year away.
Anyway, Meaghan and I made it through the first day very well. Her favorite part, you'll never guess, TAKING THE BUS. She loves to take the bus both to and from school.
SO this will bring and end to post number 2. Not much but a few tidbits of that last few weeks.
Enjoy
B
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Day 1
Wow. So this is day 1. A new life? I don't know. I want to believe that it will stick, that I will be able to sustain my momentum, but like a lot of things in life momentum can easily fade. I am hoping by starting this blog I will be more committed to the new me. I should clarify what I want to change:
1. loose weight. (85 lbs to be exact)
2.get my Rheumatoid Arthritis under control
3.be a bigger part of my daughters life. (be able to keep up with her0
4.Do more for my hubby
I have 2 big addictions - Chocolate and Pepsi. I want to kick these habits. I don't want to say I WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER piece of chocolate or another can of Pepsi, that is not remotely reasonable. I do want to however only have that every once in a while. as a treat, As a quiet moment, one that I will truly enjoy. I want to be healthy. I am happy. I love my life, family and house. I want to love my body.
I say I want to love my body because it is riddled with pain everyday. Everyday it is a fight to just get out of bed and face the day. My pain is not well controlled but I am so tired of it having such a big pull in my life. I hate that it controls me and my family. There is so much I want to do but can't because of my pain. In the last 2 years I had to have both my knees replaced because they were destroyed thanks to my arthritis. I am only 31. I know a lot of people will read this and want to tell me to suck it up but until you live with this disease you have no idea what it takes from you. not only has it taken about 20 years off my life expectancy (yes if my medication does not kill me the disease will) it has taken my ability to even get on the floor with my daughter.
This is it for today. I am tired of talking about it and my hands hurt from typing. So I am signing off.
1. loose weight. (85 lbs to be exact)
2.get my Rheumatoid Arthritis under control
3.be a bigger part of my daughters life. (be able to keep up with her0
4.Do more for my hubby
I have 2 big addictions - Chocolate and Pepsi. I want to kick these habits. I don't want to say I WILL NEVER HAVE ANOTHER piece of chocolate or another can of Pepsi, that is not remotely reasonable. I do want to however only have that every once in a while. as a treat, As a quiet moment, one that I will truly enjoy. I want to be healthy. I am happy. I love my life, family and house. I want to love my body.
I say I want to love my body because it is riddled with pain everyday. Everyday it is a fight to just get out of bed and face the day. My pain is not well controlled but I am so tired of it having such a big pull in my life. I hate that it controls me and my family. There is so much I want to do but can't because of my pain. In the last 2 years I had to have both my knees replaced because they were destroyed thanks to my arthritis. I am only 31. I know a lot of people will read this and want to tell me to suck it up but until you live with this disease you have no idea what it takes from you. not only has it taken about 20 years off my life expectancy (yes if my medication does not kill me the disease will) it has taken my ability to even get on the floor with my daughter.
This is it for today. I am tired of talking about it and my hands hurt from typing. So I am signing off.
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